reblogging for the second time because I still laugh uncontrollably. in my mind the cows are trying to be gracious about their strange gift. ‘yes we love it thank u’
[ID/CC: Tiktok by Max Cookie (maxjcookie)
Shot from first-person perspective, from the cab of a blue tractor that is being slowly surrounded by a variety of brown, white, and black cows, while in a field of dirt.
Caption reads: Tried to dig out the pond because it dried up and the herd thinks i have hay.
Farmer: “So the cows think that I’m trying to deliver hay and I’m trying to deliver a Fucking Hole! God damnit! GET AWAY! NO! Oh my God, figure it out. Ladies! It’s like a zombie movie. I’m trying to DIG! There’s not anything! Stop!”
Cow: “Moo.”
Farmer: “What!?”
A different cow: “MOOO.”
Farmer: “There’s nothing! Oh my God it’s the entire herd.”
Farmer continues to speak as he drops the dirt in his tractor’s scoop onto the ground. The cows surround this too.
Farmer: “GUYS! Guys! It’s dirt! It’s dirt! It’s dirt! It’s not hay! Go find the other gr–”
The cows begin to smell the dirt pile.
Farmer: “It’s dirt! You know it’s dirt!”
Farmer zooms in on one brown and white cow in particular.
Farmer: “Y–Claire!”
Video cuts to cow rubbing its face on the dirt pile.
Farmer: “What. In. The. Absolute. Shit are you DOING!? What are ya doin’? What’s that about? It’s dirt!”
if you find yourself in a situation like this, don’t panic. there are people who can, and will, help you <3
[video ID: a pale skinned person with blue hair and a lip ring is shown from the waist up, speaking into the camera. transcript (some of the captions on the video are not spoken, so those are added in parentheses):
“I don’t know who needs to hear this today but there is no such thing as a “leaked nude”! (obvs don’t mean colloquially) 1. if your nude is behind a paywall like onlyfans, it is: copyright infringement and onlyfans will fight for you. 2. if your nude was taken or sent in private, that is: revenge porn, and as of 2019, is illegal in most states and countries where social media is prominent.
in 2019 one of my girls came to me and said that her ex was threatening to leak her nudes. she played me his voicemail and I fucking laughed. homeboy left his full name and threat on a recorded message.
usually I’m not very supportive of the police if that’s not obvious (I made this decision based on the people involved and didn’t put anyone in danger) but in this situation I told her to call. she filed completely over the phone, never met with an officer and he never saw her face (she also said that he didn’t make any remarks or judgements on her which was important to her). that officer called the dumbass and told him that he was facing a felony in his state. basically, the dumbass wet himself and never contacted her again.
but if you don’t want to go that route you can always get a lawyer involved (to inform and advocate for you). I know even that sounds like “how can I do this?” but for my she’s, gays, & theys out there: if you are in an abusive situation or they’re committing crimes against you, some lawyers in your city will work for free.” end ID/transcript]
I wish this feeling upon everyone who wants to wear a dress, its really the best
this makes me so happy as a fat hairy guy who likes skirts and dresses i never get to see guys like me in dresses it’s always skinny twinks this makes me so happy 🥺🥺
